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How to use this Clowning Around Berlin™ City Guide and Picture Book
#1... It is all on one page, so if you have slow modem, you read my AMUSING ANTIDOTES while you wait!!
#2... Scroll in the page or CLICK the special up-down-and-around links.
#3... Have some fun! Start.
What in heck is it?
I make this website for my friends from Seattle ("hi!") and Oblivia who want to be knowing where now I am living. Plus for all strangers in the world ("peace!") to say what Berlin is ALL ABOUT.
I also want to make more Berlin photos with my friend Bill (Herr Wm. Schmidt, Jr. to you!) with idea of to make CLOWNING AROUND BERLIN POSTCARDS and books!! I also am having the idea to make Clowning Around Berlin city tours or whatever you say you want. Just tell me.
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Quiz: What is the NUMBER ONE sight in Berlin??
The construction crane! Even still in 2003.
One day in summer I have GONE FISHING with a crane at the German Parliament Building (Reichstag -- rhyming with YIKES). This is a capital-B Beautiful Building with the glass dome on top where you can look down on all the politicians and take pictures in the clown mirror pillar!
Have you gone fishing here? What do YOU think I can catch!!? Tell me with form underneath and then we photoshop what you say into the picture!
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Those crazy GERMAN PEOPLE, how they talk. They are calling this silly thing the "Fernsehturm", what can translate as TV Broadcasting Tower. But for real it means "Far Seeing Tower," which you can do when you visit Berlin!
You go up in here for paying Euros but then you can see overall Berlin.
From at the top I look only like juggling ant. What I would like to see someday! Fleas -- that's nothing -- with wings it is piece of cake to be circusy. What I want to see is the juggling ant circus! OK, but that is a sideways detour!
What magic sideshow you CAN see at Alexanderplatz (where this futuristical tower is at) sometimes if you are LUCKY: the shell game guys. You can see circus crime ring UP CLOSE!!! I have had this happen the time after I go up in the tower ball at top to see people ants. When I come down are the shell guys I have only heard from. If you see these BE CAREFUL -- the ones who are winning (maybe sometime losing) are only the accomplishes of him who moves the ball around under the boxes. Tourist never wins! 100%! ONLY WATCH! But that makes great big fun cuz they are real clowns -- magicians gone bad!!!
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I LOVE BERLIN!
I am living near to where THE WALL used to be, and I go always to the Mauerpark, to bring offerings to lay to her feet, to say she should want to being my girlfriend.
She is so cool she breaking my heart.
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I LOVE BERLIN!
Famous THE WALL is all most nowhere to seen, except with Mauerpark and Eastside Gallery for touristing. But there are more old and new walls, and many grafitti on everyone.
Grafitti is camelflage for clowns! What is good when I get embarrassed in front of her.
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ACHTUNG! Men working... with whiteface! And bright-colors uniform so you do not drive over!!!
Berlin is capital city for construction crane AND for circus!!! "Clowns Working" signs you might find some days at Cameleon, Wintergarten, Friedrichstadtpalast ("Fred's City Palace"), Ufa Fabrik, Chapeau, and much more variety theater scenes!
Berlin is LOCKER! What means loose! What means ARTSY!!! In Berlin, one is seeing more tattoos than 3-pc. suits!!!!
I have had punk Berlin haircut one time, to make show for the freaks in Kreuzberg, but no more. But you can see in some pictures on website, like my clowns' homepage. And NO TATTOOS (my mother would be roll around in her grave), only circus scars I can show you when you visit!
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Everywhere you're turning in Berlin, you throw up your hat and there is more landmark. Here along next to Fernsehturm is Rotes Rathaus.
This means Red City Hall, which is TRUE. The people from history were naming it this for the brick color, but RED is really today the color of Berlin. Logo is red. Government is red-red (communists and social democrats teamwork). Plus finance book is also in red. Deep red!
So us Berliners all are wanting you to come and visit us with your Euro-dollars and Yankee GREEN-BACKS! No, I am KIDDING!! For real life example, when you shop in East part, the keeper of the shop is trying to sell you what is cheaper than what you are asking for! My Dad tells to me this is like in Oblivia when I was baby. Communist customer service!!!!
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Here is PROST (3 cheers!) to the German people -- dem deutschen Volke, it says on Reichstag! This is what underlined is in New Germany, but now all the immigrant people from east and south and all around are also Deutschen!! Berlin is colorful is what the Green Party people say. What is German? Döner Kebab, Rap musik, capeiero, and clowns from Oblivia!!
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Next city to look for?
Can you believe this sign??? Los Angeles is PARTNER CITY from Berlin!
So maybe someday I go and make the Clowning Around™ LA City Guide!
But in all honestly LA is opposite to Berlin. Berlin is the City of Angels, with the Victory Column -- remember the movie from Wim Wenders!? And Los Angeles is the evil twin: City of Smog and MOVIE MOGULS! OK, they both have movies and I am loving movies!!!! Take backs: I love LA.
But I like to work in LA and then RUN AWAY FAST. So for tourists (and the friends who visit me), next I want to make the Clowning Around™ Seattle picture guidebook. Or Clowning Around™ San Francisco, for great fun!!
If you want to buy such a thing, email me ( pavel@merzo.de ) so I can tell the BIGWIG PUBLISHING PEOPLE to help me make some books!! Thank you.
Please to enjoy your Aufenthalt in Berlin!!!!!
